Christabelle的藝想世界

最近要跟學生上這首詩，"The Giving Tree"。這是首用字非常淺顯簡單的童詩，作者是 Shel Silverstein。Silvertein 從未受過任何文學的訓練，卻擅長用非常簡單而且口語化的語詞與句子，傳遞深切的人生哲學與意義。最為我們知道的就是 The Missing Piece「失落的一角」，還記得那個滾來滾去亟欲尋找能與自己契合的小碎片嗎？

而這首The Giving Tree 同樣是一首很具有代表性的作品。詩中描寫一顆蘋果樹及一個小男孩的關係，從小男孩小時候非常依賴這棵樹，長大之後離開了樹，卻又回來對這棵樹予取予求，直到小男孩老了想找地方安歇了，樹儘管掏光了自己所有，卻仍然挺起身子做小男孩的後盾。

詩的意境也很清楚，即在刻畫母親對孩子無盡的付出。詩中一再強調 "the tree was happy"，就是這種無怨無悔的表現。

之所以挑這個時候來分享這首詩，是因為今天是我母親過世16年的日子。想想去年的今天寫了《母親二三事》一文遙念母親在世時幾項我還記憶猶新的事件，而同一個日子竟又到來，毫無驚覺地。時間流去的速度總是讓人措手不及。

那些子欲養而親不待的悔恨，在母親過世前幾年我已經做過懺悔，至今已然心無罣礙。不過每次回想起年幼時對母親那種傲慢的態度，依舊過意不去。我天生叛逆，表面上聽從母親的教訓，但內心仍舊對母親有諸多抱怨。同時，我也不顧家裡的經濟狀況，堅持要跟同學一樣參加補習。母親什麼也沒說，卻總能提供我最好的就學環境，在忙著家中生意時還得不論晴雨地幫我送便當、接送我上下學趕補習。

我從未聽母親埋怨過半句。

在考上中山女中後，我更是不可一世。在我們那個鄉下地方村子裡，有多少人能有這樣的能力上台北的高中，更何況是前三志願？我沈浸在這樣的虛榮之中，但我卻沒想過，這白衫黑裙的背後，全都是母親汗水的累積。她可能每天都在擔心，下個月家裡的錢夠不夠用，或者下學期的學費該怎麼節省才存的到。

同樣地，我從未聽母親抱怨過半句。

人常說養兒方知父母恩。我不知道我有沒有這個機會成為一名母親，一方面我可能還沒有那樣的無私，另一方面我也沒有那樣的勇氣。因此，我選擇教育工作，一項也許跟當母親很接近的工作。但無論如何，我很清楚我永遠都不可能像一名母親那樣不斷地付出，因為至少遇到冥頑不靈的孩子，我忍一忍也許三兩年就過去，但身為母親卻是一輩子的牽掛。就像 The Giving Tree 一樣。 

And the tree was happy....

ps. 據說葛蘿的雞蛋妹出生了！真是天大的好消息！不過也代表著葛蘿接下來為人母的日子任重道遠，一輩子得承受這甜蜜的負擔。

[延伸閱讀]

母親二三事

---

The Giving Tree

Once there was a tree...
And she loved a little boy. 

And everyday 
the boy would come 
and he would gather 
her leaves 
and make them into crowns 
and play king of the forest. 

He would climb up her trunk 
and swing from her branches 
and eat apples.
And they would play hide-and-go-seek.
And when he was tired 
he would sleep in her shade. 

And the boy loved the tree...
very much.
And the tree was happy.

But time went by.
And the boy grew older 
and the tree was often alone.
Then one day the boy came to the tree 
and the tree said,  "Come, Boy, come and climb up my trunk
and swing from my branches 
and eat apples and play in my shade 
and be happy." 

"I am too big to climb and play,"  said the boy. 
"I want to buy things and have fun. 
I want some money.
Can you give me some money?" 

I'm sorry,"  said the tree, 
"but I have no money.
I have only leaves and apples.
Take my apples, Boy, 
and sell them in the city.
Then you will have money and you will be happy."
And so the boy climbed up the tree 
and gathered her apples 
and carried them away.
And the tree was happy. 

But the boy stayed away 
for a long time...
and the tree was sad.

And then one day 
the boy came back 
and the tree shook with joy 
and she said, "Come, Boy, 
climb up my trunk 
and swing from my branches 
and be happy." 

"I am too busy to climb trees,"  
said the boy. 
"I want a house to keep me warm,"  
he said.
"I want a wife and I want 
children, and so I need a house.
Can you give me a house?"
"I have no house,"  said the tree.
"The forest is my house,
but you may cut off my branches
and build a house.
Then you will be happy."
And so the boy cut off her branches 
and carried them away to build his house.
And the tree was happy.

But the boy stayed away 
for a long time.
And when he came back, 
the tree was so happy 
she could hardly speak.
"Come, Boy,"  she whispered,
"come and play."
"I am too old and sad to play,"  
said the boy.
"I want a boat that will take me 
far away from here. 
Can you give me a boat?" 

"Cut down my trunk 
and make a boat,"  said the tree. 
"Then you can sail away...
...and be happy."
And so the boy cut down her trunk 
and made a boat 
and sailed away.  And the tree was happy...
but not really.

And after a long time 
the boy came back again.
"I am sorry, Boy,"  said the tree,
"but I have nothing left to give you--
My apples are gone."
"My teeth are too weak for apples,"  
said the boy. 

"My branches are gone,"  
said the tree.
"You cannot swing on them."
"I am too old to swing on branches," said the boy. 

"My trunk is gone,"  said the tree. 
"You cannot climb."
"I am too tired to climb,"  said the boy. 
"I wish that I could 
give you something...
but I have nothing left.
I am just an old stump.  I am sorry..." 
"I don't need very much now,"  
said the boy,
"just a quiet place to sit and rest.  
I am very tired." 
"Well," said the tree, 
straightening herself up 
as much as she could,
"well, an old stump is good 
for sitting and resting.
Come, Boy, sit down. 
Sit down and rest." And the boy did.
 
And the tree was happy.